Sunday, May 18, 2008

Shivisms

Many of you are wondering why we have christened our magnificent cyber home “The Party at Shivs”. You see Marty (IRA) and I have a dear friend who we hold dear to our hearts named Shiv. Shiv is a great guy, he’s honest, intelligent, extremely polite, and tremendously humble, and he’s completely oblivious to his own awesomeness. What makes cool is his own way of doing and saying things, mannerisms, except that would not make them original, which they are, so I would like to present the Shivisms of Shiv,

A) Dialect
Shiv has his own dialect of English with its own vocabulary and syntax

1) “mad dash”: a quick run
2) “the beast is home”: Shiv’s return home
3) “too good”: expresses great joy
4) “misfortune!”: great dismay
5) “danger!/My God!”: said of a catastrophe
6) “Your hair is too good”: your hair has formed into a point and looks awful

B) Physical Reflexes

1) Shiv leg kicks when he laughs, and puts his hand on his chest
2) The ability to make an appointment seem like a late appearance, only to calmly walk by as the clock strikes
3) Spurtability, he has the ability to run at a very high pace, spontaneously. Currently being studied by biologists and physicist

C) Appearance

1) Tall frame that towers over the meek
2) Beard that makes jock stubbles look like pubic hair
3) Ability to put on formal attire in no time at all.

So in memory of our good friend, we have dubbed this blog “The Party at Shivs” because we constantly have saturnalian parties at his place, without him knowing. We will continue to honor his great character and memory till he actually calls us or meets us, and tells us to back the f**k off.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

You forgot "mass exodus."
And half the stuff you describe Shiv as is hardly true, as much as I love him.

--Sweet, I forgot my old password so had to double accounts. Hate it when that happens.

Fernando Chang said...

Yeah, I was hoping no one would notice, so yeah, I'll put it in.

So which parts do I have to correct?

Anonymous said...

Wow guys, this really is an ingenious blog. I love you for it truly. Check out mine in a few weeks once I acctually get interesting things up ;)

Unknown said...

I have to say that I have witnessed this "spurtability" in all of its spontaneity and magnificence, and surprising stamina. It is "truly a sight to behold." I just finished watching Better Off Dead...